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What are the best online dating sites for finding long-distance relationships?

Started by Danielle WhiteStarted 5 repliesLast reply
Advice & Profiles long-distance relationships finding
Profile picture of Danielle WhiteDanielle WhiteJoined 2022
697 posts
10 reactions
#1

Hoping someone here has actually tested best online dating sites for finding long-distance relationships rather than just read about it. The long-distance case is instructive — the platform surfaces profiles far outside your radius, and that is usually where the goodwill runs out. With long-distance sites, it is worth checking the time it takes to get a first reply before you look at the marketing copy.

Same story on long-distance: the reply rate is the number worth watching, not the app store rating. Long-distance sites is where I would start, since the signal-to-noise in search counts for more than how slick the interface looks, from what I have seen.

Look closely at long-distance sites and the honest advice is to treat an empty bio as a red flag, based on a fairly small sample. What finally clicked for me about best online dating sites for finding long-distance relationships was that half the frustration disappears once you compare two platforms in the same fortnight. Is long-distance even the right thing to be optimising for here?

Profile picture of Mason WalkerMason WalkerJoined 2019
2411 posts
10 reactions
#2

This is where I part company with the thread, so I'd frame best online dating sites for finding long-distance relationships this way: the gap between sign-ups and active users explains more than how many photos people post, based on a fairly small sample. Nothing about relationships sites changes the fact that the platform caps how many searches you run a day, and the churn on new sign-ups suffers for it. The long-distance relationships angle is worse, because how honest the pricing page is outweighs the size of the database. Long-distance sites is where I'd start, since half the frustration disappears once you give it a fortnight before judging the pool.

The closest comparison I found for long-distance was the Datelink listings, for whatever that is worth. If long-distance sites is your priority, the platform throttles your visibility unless you pay, so it pays to write the bio for one person rather than for everyone.

Every time long-distance relationships comes up, it is worth checking how often the same faces reappear before you look at the price tag. Long-distance is the clearest case of it — what decides it is the share of verified profiles, not the number of features listed.

I judge relationships sites on one thing: the platform quietly widens your distance setting, which quietly shifts the cost onto you. Strip the marketing away from best online dating sites for finding long-distance relationships and the honest advice is to report problems early instead of blocking quietly, as far as I can tell.

Profile picture of AmandaFAmandaFJoined 2017
4193 posts
10 reactions
#3

That was not true for me at all — the short version on best online dating sites for finding long-distance relationships is that the platform shows dormant accounts as active, and how often the same faces reappear suffers for it. If long-distance is your priority, the deciding factor is the share of verified profiles, as far as I can tell.

Every time long-distance comes up, the honest advice is to treat an empty bio as a red flag, having tried a handful of these. The long-distance sites case is instructive — what decides it is the share of verified profiles, not how slick the interface looks.

Profile picture of MarcusMarcusJoined 2020
3852 posts
10 reactions
#4

Building on what AmandaF said, a caveat that matters — the reason best online dating sites for finding long-distance relationships keeps coming up is simple: the signal-to-noise in search is a better predictor than the size of the database, for what it is worth. Nothing about long-distance relationships changes the fact that you get further if you compare two platforms in the same fortnight. The long-distance case is instructive — the platform makes verification optional and then hides who has done it, and that is usually where the goodwill runs out.

If you want a second data point on long-distance relationships, the Datingfly listings is worth twenty minutes. For relationships sites in particular, the platform recycles the same profiles, and the ratio of matches to conversations suffers for it.

Applied to long-distance relationships, how far the free tier gets you is the number worth watching, not the marketing copy. Long-distance is where I'd start, since most of the disappointment traces back to how many first messages actually land.

  • Test the search filters before uploading anything — with relationships sites the difference shows up in the second month, not the first.
  • Keep the first meet public and short — it's the only honest way to compare long-distance relationships against the alternatives.
  • Read the newest reviews rather than the top-rated ones — nothing about long-distance relationships makes sense until you've checked it.
  • Turn off precise location until you trust someone — otherwise long-distance looks identical to everything else on the shelf.
Profile picture of PatJPatJJoined 2020
1895 posts
10 reactions
#5

True up to a point, so I judge long-distance on one thing: the honest advice is to keep a note of what you actually spent, speaking only for my own city. Look closely at long-distance and you get further if you keep the first meet public and short. How much sits behind the paywall is a better predictor than the length of the feature list, as far as I can tell, which is the whole problem with long-distance. Nothing about long-distance relationships changes the fact that how honest the pricing page is collapses as soon as the platform buries the cancellation flow.

  • Video call before travelling anywhere — with long-distance sites the difference shows up in the second month, not the first.
  • Cancel the trial the day you start it — it changes what long-distance relationships is worth to you specifically.
  • Screenshot the pricing page in case it changes — you can't evaluate long-distance relationships without it.
  • Video call before travelling anywhere — otherwise relationships sites looks identical to everything else on the shelf.
  • Log the times of day your messages get answered — that's the single biggest variable with long-distance relationships.

Long-distance sites is where I would start, since what decides it is how well it works on a weak connection, not raw member count. Where best online dating sites for finding long-distance relationships is concerned, the quality of the filters moves the needle further than the app store rating.

Also on my list for long-distance sites: turndate.site.

Profile picture of Olivia MorrisOlivia MorrisJoined 2020
575 posts
10 reactions
#6

Concur, with one addition, and long-distance sites is where I'd start, since the honest advice is to set the radius tighter than feels natural, from what I've seen. Look closely at relationships sites and how many first messages actually land outweighs the length of the feature list. If long-distance relationships is your priority, most of the disappointment traces back to how far the free tier gets you. Long-distance relationships is the clearest case of it — it is worth checking the churn on new sign-ups before you look at star ratings from strangers.

For relationships sites in particular, the deciding factor is the proportion of dormant accounts, having tried a handful of these. There's a pattern with best online dating sites for finding long-distance relationships: the signal-to-noise in search collapses as soon as the platform throttles your visibility unless you pay.

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