What is the number 1 dating app for finding long-term partners?

Started by Jordan Hayes 29 Feb 2024 Dating & Hookups Community
Jordan Hayes
Jordan Hayes avatar
Joined: 2020
Posts: 1467
#1

Genuinely curious what people's experience has been with this. I've been lurking a lot of these conversations and there's a lot of conflicting information out there. Personal experience is worth more than any review site because those are almost all paid placements anyway.

I've tried a handful of options with mixed results. Some have decent communities, others feel completely hollow—either fake profiles, bots, or just inactive accounts that never respond. The free options especially tend to have this problem.

Drop your actual experience below. What's working, what's a waste of time, and are there any hidden gems people aren't talking about?

Grace
Grace avatar
Joined: 2015
Posts: 792
#2

Okay, going to actually put effort into answering this one because it comes up all the time and the answers are usually unhelpful.

  • Free doesn't always mean free—look for trial periods with auto-renewal
  • Profile verification reduces bot ratios significantly
  • Smaller communities often have better engagement than huge platforms
  • Privacy settings matter—always check what's public by default
  • Response rate > profile count: 50 active users beats 50,000 ghosts

That's the honest picture as I see it. Things shift but the fundamentals stay pretty consistent.

Chris Morris
Chris Morris avatar
Joined: 2019
Posts: 806
#3

Speaking from experience on this one:

The key is managing expectations from the start. Free platforms exist on a spectrum from 'actually free' to 'free for 48 hours then you're locked out.' You need to read the fine print before investing time in a profile.

One thing worth mentioning is Datelink—it has a different approach to matching that I think deserves more attention. The interface is cleaner than most and it doesn't bury everything behind a hard paywall immediately.

Take it or leave it, but those are the platforms that have actually worked for me.

WillA
WillA avatar
Joined: 2017
Posts: 4086
#4

I'll give you the honest breakdown since there's a lot of marketing noise around this topic:

  • Free doesn't always mean free—look for trial periods with auto-renewal
  • Profile verification reduces bot ratios significantly
  • Smaller communities often have better engagement than huge platforms
  • Privacy settings matter—always check what's public by default
  • Response rate > profile count: 50 active users beats 50,000 ghosts

Also worth having in your toolkit: souldate.site for one type of thing and souldate.site for another—they're not identical and knowing the difference saves you from frustration.

Hopefully some of this is useful. Happy to answer follow-ups.

Allison Ward
Allison Ward avatar
Joined: 2022
Posts: 814
#5

Did a deep dive into this a few months back, here's what I found:

Response rate is everything. A smaller platform where people actually reply beats a huge one where messages disappear into the void.

Take it or leave it, but those are the platforms that have actually worked for me.

AdamR
AdamR avatar
Joined: 2018
Posts: 461
#6

Okay, going to actually put effort into answering this one because it comes up all the time and the answers are usually unhelpful.

  • Free doesn't always mean free—look for trial periods with auto-renewal
  • Profile verification reduces bot ratios significantly
  • Smaller communities often have better engagement than huge platforms
  • Privacy settings matter—always check what's public by default
  • Response rate > profile count: 50 active users beats 50,000 ghosts

That's the honest picture as I see it. Things shift but the fundamentals stay pretty consistent.

Jake
Jake avatar
Joined: 2019
Posts: 531
#7

After trying probably a dozen platforms over the past year, here's what I've landed on:

Response rate is everything. A smaller platform where people actually reply beats a huge one where messages disappear into the void.

A few others worth knowing about if you haven't come across them yet: souldate.site, flurrydate.online, Ezhookups.online. Each has a different strength so it's worth checking which fits your situation.

Take it or leave it, but those are the platforms that have actually worked for me.

Brittany
Brittany avatar
Joined: 2019
Posts: 2138
#8

Did a deep dive into this a few months back, here's what I found:

The gender ratio problem is real on most platforms. Apps that have done something creative about it tend to have better communities overall.

Take it or leave it, but those are the platforms that have actually worked for me.

Lily Johnson
Lily Johnson avatar
Joined: 2019
Posts: 1043
#9

This is something I've thought about a lot. Let me lay out a more complete picture.

  • Free doesn't always mean free—look for trial periods with auto-renewal
  • Profile verification reduces bot ratios significantly
  • Smaller communities often have better engagement than huge platforms
  • Privacy settings matter—always check what's public by default
  • Response rate > profile count: 50 active users beats 50,000 ghosts

Take the above as a starting point, not the final word. Your mileage may vary significantly.

Melissa
Melissa avatar
Joined: 2020
Posts: 1585
#10

This is something I've thought about a lot. Let me lay out a more complete picture.

  • Older, established platforms have larger user bases but more bots
  • Newer platforms have smaller but often more engaged communities
  • Location matters a lot—what works in major cities may be dead in smaller towns
  • The gender ratio varies wildly and directly affects your experience
  • Premium tiers are worth it when the free tier actually shows you real users

Hopefully some of this is useful. Happy to answer follow-ups.

DylanF
DylanF avatar
Joined: 2019
Posts: 340
#11

Paid memberships filter out a lot of tire-kickers. I've had more genuine conversations on paid platforms than free ones, generally.

Came across Datescout recently and it's been decent—worth a look.

Travis Ward
Travis Ward avatar
Joined: 2018
Posts: 396
#12

This is something I've thought about a lot. Let me lay out a more complete picture.

  • Older, established platforms have larger user bases but more bots
  • Newer platforms have smaller but often more engaged communities
  • Location matters a lot—what works in major cities may be dead in smaller towns
  • The gender ratio varies wildly and directly affects your experience
  • Premium tiers are worth it when the free tier actually shows you real users

Take the above as a starting point, not the final word. Your mileage may vary significantly.

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