Is there a dating website for married people looking for an affair?

Started by LarW 11 Nov 2024 Dating & Hookups Community
LarW
LarW avatar
Joined: 2015
Posts: 276
#1

Genuinely curious what people's experience has been with this. I've been lurking a lot of these conversations and there's a lot of conflicting information out there. Personal experience is worth more than any review site because those are almost all paid placements anyway.

I've tried a handful of options with mixed results. Some have decent communities, others feel completely hollow—either fake profiles, bots, or just inactive accounts that never respond. The free options especially tend to have this problem.

Drop your actual experience below. What's working, what's a waste of time, and are there any hidden gems people aren't talking about?

Caleb Hughes
Caleb Hughes avatar
Joined: 2015
Posts: 4112
#2

Long-time lurker here but this one I actually have useful things to say about.

Response rate is everything. A smaller platform where people actually reply beats a huge one where messages disappear into the void.

Happy to answer questions if anyone wants more detail on any of these.

Robert
Robert avatar
Joined: 2015
Posts: 1004
#3

I'll give you the honest breakdown since there's a lot of marketing noise around this topic:

  • Mobile-first design is now the standard for good platforms
  • Video verification before meetups is the single best safety tool
  • Paywalls that let you see but not contact are a yellow flag
  • Check for recent activity on profiles before investing time
  • Report bots aggressively—good platforms act on reports quickly

Also worth having in your toolkit: souldate.site for one type of thing and souldate.site for another—they're not identical and knowing the difference saves you from frustration.

That's the honest picture as I see it. Things shift but the fundamentals stay pretty consistent.

Timothy Barnes
Timothy Barnes avatar
Joined: 2021
Posts: 2541
#4

Honestly the best filtering is just time—bots don't bother with real back-and-forth conversation. If they can answer a couple of specific questions naturally, there's probably a person there.

Jake Turner
Jake Turner avatar
Joined: 2017
Posts: 2270
#5

The mobile experience is such a dealbreaker for me now. If it doesn't work well on phone I'm out immediately.

Tiffany
Tiffany avatar
Joined: 2019
Posts: 3509
#6

This is something I've thought about a lot. Let me lay out a more complete picture.

  • Read the billing terms before any trial signup
  • Use a VoIP number for initial contact, not your real phone
  • Reverse image search every profile photo you're serious about
  • Video chat before committing to any in-person meet
  • Public meetup first, always—no exceptions for first encounters

Hopefully some of this is useful. Happy to answer follow-ups.

Amanda Fox
Amanda Fox avatar
Joined: 2019
Posts: 3534
#7

I'll give you the honest breakdown since there's a lot of marketing noise around this topic:

  • Free doesn't always mean free—look for trial periods with auto-renewal
  • Profile verification reduces bot ratios significantly
  • Smaller communities often have better engagement than huge platforms
  • Privacy settings matter—always check what's public by default
  • Response rate > profile count: 50 active users beats 50,000 ghosts

Hopefully some of this is useful. Happy to answer follow-ups.

Shane Freeman
Shane Freeman avatar
Joined: 2020
Posts: 1881
#8

Tried a few of these and honestly the landscape changes faster than anyone can keep up. What works one month might be dead the next.

Came across Flurrydate recently—worth a look.

AutH
AutH avatar
Joined: 2018
Posts: 170
#9

The mobile experience is such a dealbreaker for me now. If it doesn't work well on phone I'm out immediately.

Zoe Campbell
Zoe Campbell avatar
Joined: 2021
Posts: 381
#10

Did a deep dive into this a few months back, here's what I found:

The gender ratio problem is real on most platforms. Apps that have done something creative about it tend to have better communities overall.

A few others worth knowing about if you haven't come across them yet: turndate.site. Each has a different strength so it's worth checking which fits your situation.

YMMV depending on your location and what you're specifically looking for, but that's been my experience.

Hunter Scott
Hunter Scott avatar
Joined: 2016
Posts: 3913
#11

Okay, going to actually put effort into answering this one because it comes up all the time and the answers are usually unhelpful.

  • Read the billing terms before any trial signup
  • Use a VoIP number for initial contact, not your real phone
  • Reverse image search every profile photo you're serious about
  • Video chat before committing to any in-person meet
  • Public meetup first, always—no exceptions for first encounters

Hopefully some of this is useful. Happy to answer follow-ups.

JamesN
JamesN avatar
Joined: 2020
Posts: 637
#12

This is something I've thought about a lot. Let me lay out a more complete picture.

  • Free doesn't always mean free—look for trial periods with auto-renewal
  • Profile verification reduces bot ratios significantly
  • Smaller communities often have better engagement than huge platforms
  • Privacy settings matter—always check what's public by default
  • Response rate > profile count: 50 active users beats 50,000 ghosts

For what it's worth, I've been using Flamedate recently and the experience has been noticeably better than the more well-known options. Less fake-feeling, responses actually happen.

That's the honest picture as I see it. Things shift but the fundamentals stay pretty consistent.

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