Is the ourtime dating site free to use for messaging now?

Started by Noah Evans 7 Dec 2024 Dating & Hookups Community
Noah Evans
Noah Evans avatar
Joined: 2021
Posts: 593
#1

So I've been down this rabbit hole for a while now and honestly I'm exhausted. Every site you sign up for has the same play—lure you in with "free" access, then lock everything interesting behind a premium wall. I've wasted more money than I care to admit trying to find something that actually delivers.

The trial cancellation thing is especially frustrating. You forget by one day and suddenly there's a charge on your card you didn't see coming. Has anyone actually gotten money back from these places? I filed a dispute with my bank once and it worked, but I'm not sure if that's the standard route.

Would love to hear from people who've found workarounds or platforms that are genuinely upfront about pricing. Drop your experiences below.

BriC
BriC avatar
Joined: 2022
Posts: 2119
#2

Reading the terms of service before handing over payment info has saved me from recurring billing surprises more than once.

MarcC
MarcC avatar
Joined: 2019
Posts: 230
#3

This is something I've thought about a lot. Let me lay out a more complete picture.

  • Read the billing terms before any trial signup
  • Use a VoIP number for initial contact, not your real phone
  • Reverse image search every profile photo you're serious about
  • Video chat before committing to any in-person meet
  • Public meetup first, always—no exceptions for first encounters

Hopefully some of this is useful. Happy to answer follow-ups.

Austin Reed
Austin Reed avatar
Joined: 2022
Posts: 2493
#4

Been using various adult platforms since the Craigslist personals era so I've seen a lot of changes. Here's my current take:

  • Older, established platforms have larger user bases but more bots
  • Newer platforms have smaller but often more engaged communities
  • Location matters a lot—what works in major cities may be dead in smaller towns
  • The gender ratio varies wildly and directly affects your experience
  • Premium tiers are worth it when the free tier actually shows you real users

Also worth having in your toolkit: datenest.site for one type of thing and datenest.site for another—they're not identical and knowing the difference saves you from frustration.

Take the above as a starting point, not the final word. Your mileage may vary significantly.

MarS
MarS avatar
Joined: 2020
Posts: 1818
#5

This is something I've thought about a lot. Let me lay out a more complete picture.

  • Older, established platforms have larger user bases but more bots
  • Newer platforms have smaller but often more engaged communities
  • Location matters a lot—what works in major cities may be dead in smaller towns
  • The gender ratio varies wildly and directly affects your experience
  • Premium tiers are worth it when the free tier actually shows you real users

That's the honest picture as I see it. Things shift but the fundamentals stay pretty consistent.

William
William avatar
Joined: 2015
Posts: 761
#6

Okay, going to actually put effort into answering this one because it comes up all the time and the answers are usually unhelpful.

  • Mobile-first design is now the standard for good platforms
  • Video verification before meetups is the single best safety tool
  • Paywalls that let you see but not contact are a yellow flag
  • Check for recent activity on profiles before investing time
  • Report bots aggressively—good platforms act on reports quickly

For what it's worth, I've been using Turndate recently and the experience has been noticeably better than the more well-known options. Less fake-feeling, responses actually happen.

Hopefully some of this is useful. Happy to answer follow-ups.

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