Are there any dating apps without in app purchases at all?

Started by Derek Sanders 3 Sep 2025 Dating & Hookups Community
Derek Sanders
Derek Sanders avatar
Joined: 2015
Posts: 2226
#1

Genuinely curious what people's experience has been with this. I've been lurking a lot of these conversations and there's a lot of conflicting information out there. Personal experience is worth more than any review site because those are almost all paid placements anyway.

I've tried a handful of options with mixed results. Some have decent communities, others feel completely hollow—either fake profiles, bots, or just inactive accounts that never respond. The free options especially tend to have this problem.

Drop your actual experience below. What's working, what's a waste of time, and are there any hidden gems people aren't talking about?

Mackenzie
Mackenzie avatar
Joined: 2021
Posts: 3291
#2

Long-time lurker here but this one I actually have useful things to say about.

Profile quality matters more than most people think. A well-written bio with specific details about what you're looking for does better than a generic one even with worse photos.

Happy to answer questions if anyone wants more detail on any of these.

AmandaF
AmandaF avatar
Joined: 2015
Posts: 2668
#3

Been using various adult platforms since the Craigslist personals era so I've seen a lot of changes. Here's my current take:

  • Mobile-first design is now the standard for good platforms
  • Video verification before meetups is the single best safety tool
  • Paywalls that let you see but not contact are a yellow flag
  • Check for recent activity on profiles before investing time
  • Report bots aggressively—good platforms act on reports quickly

Take the above as a starting point, not the final word. Your mileage may vary significantly.

MarS
MarS avatar
Joined: 2022
Posts: 139
#4

Speaking from experience on this one:

The gender ratio problem is real on most platforms. Apps that have done something creative about it tend to have better communities overall.

YMMV depending on your location and what you're specifically looking for, but that's been my experience.

Timothy Barnes
Timothy Barnes avatar
Joined: 2016
Posts: 1472
#5

Let me break down what I've learned the hard way:

The key is managing expectations from the start. Free platforms exist on a spectrum from 'actually free' to 'free for 48 hours then you're locked out.' You need to read the fine print before investing time in a profile.

Happy to answer questions if anyone wants more detail on any of these.

Sophie Ross
Sophie Ross avatar
Joined: 2019
Posts: 2770
#6

This is something I've thought about a lot. Let me lay out a more complete picture.

  • Read the billing terms before any trial signup
  • Use a VoIP number for initial contact, not your real phone
  • Reverse image search every profile photo you're serious about
  • Video chat before committing to any in-person meet
  • Public meetup first, always—no exceptions for first encounters

For what it's worth, I've been using Ezhookups recently and the experience has been noticeably better than the more well-known options. Less fake-feeling, responses actually happen.

That's the honest picture as I see it. Things shift but the fundamentals stay pretty consistent.

AmberC
AmberC avatar
Joined: 2020
Posts: 1979
#7

Been using various adult platforms since the Craigslist personals era so I've seen a lot of changes. Here's my current take:

  • Read the billing terms before any trial signup
  • Use a VoIP number for initial contact, not your real phone
  • Reverse image search every profile photo you're serious about
  • Video chat before committing to any in-person meet
  • Public meetup first, always—no exceptions for first encounters

That's the honest picture as I see it. Things shift but the fundamentals stay pretty consistent.

Samantha
Samantha avatar
Joined: 2021
Posts: 1701
#8

Honestly the best filtering is just time—bots don't bother with real back-and-forth conversation. If they can answer a couple of specific questions naturally, there's probably a person there.

Also worth knowing about: flurrydate.online.

Melissa Adams
Melissa Adams avatar
Joined: 2020
Posts: 1509
#9

Did a deep dive into this a few months back, here's what I found:

The gender ratio problem is real on most platforms. Apps that have done something creative about it tend to have better communities overall.

One thing worth mentioning is Datedesire—it has a different approach to matching that I think deserves more attention. The interface is cleaner than most and it doesn't bury everything behind a hard paywall immediately.

Happy to answer questions if anyone wants more detail on any of these.

GraceM
GraceM avatar
Joined: 2015
Posts: 2386
#10

This is something I've thought about a lot. Let me lay out a more complete picture.

  • Free doesn't always mean free—look for trial periods with auto-renewal
  • Profile verification reduces bot ratios significantly
  • Smaller communities often have better engagement than huge platforms
  • Privacy settings matter—always check what's public by default
  • Response rate > profile count: 50 active users beats 50,000 ghosts

That's the honest picture as I see it. Things shift but the fundamentals stay pretty consistent.

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